WE STAY AT GRANDMA'S HOUSE by Joseph & Orla

Joe: Mummy said “Do you want to go to Grandma’s & Granddad’s house with me for a few days?” I said “No” ‘cos I thought I might be bored ‘cos Mummy can’t take us out anywhere & I didn’t want to leave Daddy on his own. But Mummy said “Granddad will take you out & I’ll be able to play with you more ‘cos I won’t have housework to do all day.” Daddy said that he would only be a little bit lonely & anyway he’d join us a few days later, so I said, “Ok.”

Orla: Mummy say “We go Grandma’s, see Rafael & Sachin & Auntie Kim & Auntie Karen & Granddad & Annie [Granddad's dog].”

Left to Right; Auntie Karen, Raphael, Grandma,Sachin & Auntie Kim

Joe: I hate going to Grandma’s & Granddad’s in the car. It takes hours. I say to Mummy “Are we nearly there?” lots of times & she says, “For God’s sake Joe, just be patient.” When we got there, Granddad took us to the beach.

Orla: I see Raphael. She a baby. Mummy say “Raphael not ‘she’ Raphael ‘he’, he boy”. I say “No him girl. All my babies [her dolls] girls.” Auntie Karen not let me hold Raphael on my knee. She say Orla too small. I crying. Granddad say “No more crying”, he give me weetie [sweet]. Raphael crying. I give her dummy.

Joe: Orla was naughty & wouldn’t go to bed for Mummy for a long time.

Orla: Dora [the doll which shares Orla’s bed] not here. Orla want Daddy put me bed. I crying. Want my Daddy.

Joe: Granddad had to go out sometimes & Mummy played with us. We did drawing & painted & did craft things. It was good. Then Granddad took me & Orla to the beach. I got lots of shells to show Daddy when he comes. We did lots of digging and found loads of interesting things lying on the beach. There were lots of people on the beach & Granddad talked to lots of them. Some of them were funny & some of them were boring.

Orla: Orla like go beach with Granddad. It very fun. Joey not nice to me. Him shout at me, I crying. Granddad say “You be nice to Orla, Joseph” & him give me weetie.

Joe: We went out with Auntie Kim & Sachin. It was a bit boring. But it wasn’t very boring. It was ok really.

Orla: I play with Sachin & Auntie Kim. Auntie Kim got dogs. I not allowed play with them. Auntie Kim & Sachin very fun.

Joe: When Daddy came, we went out every day. We went to the Sea Life Centre. I liked the sharks best. Daddy likes stingrays. I liked the octopus too. There were cool rides there. My favourite was the Tug, which swings fast & turns around at the same time, and the ride which takes you up high & then you drop down. It made me tummy feel funny. We made an ornament out of coloured sand to take back to Mummy.

Orla: I like sea horsy. It funny. I like pink fish. I like funny fish swim up to my finger. Them not eat it! We go on boat, it go round fast. I scared but Daddy hold me. Then it fun. Orla only little bit scared. I like seat go up & down. It very fun, tickle my tummy. I like roundabout.

Joe: One day Grandma took us into town to see the Olympic medallists. I don’t really understand the Olympics but it was fun to be with lots of people waving flags. Then we went to McDonalds and got a free toy. Daddy met us & we went shopping for school clothes for me and Orla. Daddy gets them because Mummy has agoraphobia. Sometimes she orders them from the internet. We were looking for a jacket & shoes & socks for me. I got nice shoes, they look like trainers. I liked a blue jacket but Daddy said that it wasn’t warm enough. Grandma saw a black jacket but I didn’t like it even though she tried to get me to like it. So I didn’t get any jacket at all but that’s ok ‘cos it’s not very cold yet.

Orla: Grandma get Orla flag same as Joey’s. Grandma give me weeties & toy in Mitdonna’s. Daddy get me jacket. It purple. I wet myself in big shop, only little bit.

Joseph looking after his little sister on a ride at Adventure Wonderland

Joe: Daddy took me & Orla to Adventure Wonderland. We left even before Mummy got up! It was quite a long journey & Daddy told me not to say “Are we nearly there yet?” all the time. I tried not to, but sometimes I forgot. Adventure Wonderland is wicked! It has cool rides & I could go on all of them. Even by myself! The roller coaster train was a little bit scary & Orla didn’t like it & the swinging boat went really high & Orla didn’t like that either but I went on them loads of times! There was a big indoor play area too with guns that shoot plastic balls and big slides. We had lunch in the café & even ice cream. And I liked the maze. We got lost. We stayed all day & I didn’t even get bored! We got home quite late & Orla was asleep in the car. It was the best day of my life!!!

Joseph goes on the swinging ship by himself!

Orla: Mummy not go with us. Joey say her have aggafofey [agoraphobia]. Me not like twain [train roller coaster]. Me not like boat swing iva [either]. It scare Orla. Orla like teacups & flying effelants [elephants] and lollipops [a swinging chair ride]. It very fun. Orla not like twain. I not wet myself.

Orla goes on the lollipop by herself

Joe: Granddad took us to the beach next day & then we went home.

Orla: Granddad good boy take Orla beach. Mummy and Daddy and Grandma good girl. Orla good girl too.

Anxiety - more medication

The second group of Austrian students arrived,

stayed

and departed.

It was another enjoyable encounter for both Marie and me. The girls were chatty and cheerful, but didn't interact with Joe & Orla as much as the first group.

While they were here, Marie was srill coping with the side effects of her medication. The adverse side effects have been reducing and the doctor increased the dose again - this time there have been no obvious changes to her mood.

So, has medication changed Marie?

Well, yes, I think so.

Her general level of anxiety is much reduced. But maybe it would have anyway? I don't know.

She has many more panic attacks than before and some of them are very intense. Yesterday she had a panic attack which included a spell where breathing was almost impossible for her. This is very unusual for Marie. Oddly, she seems unconcerned by this increase in the frequency of her panic attacks.

Her attitude is much more positive. She is spending much more quality time with the children and they are responding to this by giving her lots more affection. She has begun CBT sessions. She has regained her optimism.

Marie has set herself a goal - to get a dog. This is the first specific goal which Marie has set herself since I met her more than 8 years ago! The deal I have made with her is that she can get one when she is able to walk outside enough to let the dog go to the toilet. I don't normally interfere with Marie's aspirations, but on this occasion I am unwilling to take on the extra responsibility of looking after a dog, so if Marie is to have one, she will have to provide at least some of the care required. So far she has managed 15 steps from our front door. This may not seem much of an achievement, but it's 13 more steps than last week!

An yes...for those of you who read my last post...the increased libido is still here :-) !!

Increased Medication for Anxiety

Marie has been really suffering while getting accustomed to her medication - Cipramil (Citalopram or Celexa). She's had loads of panic attacks, although not major ones. She went through a period of wanting to sleep all the time. Lethargy ruled. But little by little she rejoined the world.

It was more than two weeks before she started to feel more "normal". Then her doctor visited, gave her a thorough check over and decided to double the dose! However, this time it hasn't taken so long to become used to the drugs.

Today Marie told me that she felt less anxious than she has done for a long, long time. Well, it seems like a long, long time to me. Perhaps it's the start of better times? I've got to be optimistic!

Btw, Marie's libido has increased. Not that I'm complaining! But I was wondering - is this a (welcome) side-effect of her medication - or am I just more irresistable than usual?