Friday, 22 February 2008

The New Dog

Collette & her fiancé Neil have just got a new dog. It's a Staffordshire Bull Terrier. She's called Dee and is 10 weeks old.
















Click on the pictures if you want to see her up close.

The children were enthralled by the puppy.




















Marie, who has been pleading for a dog since Collette took her Border Collie away with her, renewed her pleas. I've had dogs since I was 16 and I don't miss the
cleaning, feeding, grooming, walking, toilet breaks and expensive vet bills that dog ownership entails. However, I've told Marie that she can have any dog she wants (and her present favourite is an Irish Red Setter) as soon as she can walk it herself. I'm not being hard on her, am I?

22 comments:

SarahC♥ said...

Hi Robert,
As an agoraphobic who's just gone and got herself a puppy, i think maybe putting a condition on getting one is perhaps a little harsh. I'm not saying its wrong, but personally i was told that i couldn't get one unless i walked it and i thought, bloody hell, there are dogs out there, being brutally hurt, malnurished, if i can't walk it one day, its not going to be the end of the world.
Yes, the dog does need exercise and once you got the dog, Marie would see that. For the first couple of weeks you can't take it out anyway and when its peeing in the house, a trot up the road doesn't seem so bad!
I got it to HELP me go out. Perhaps you could do the same, get one as encouragement. "You have the dog, you have to walk it!"
I don't know, i am rambling now..lol I do manage to take Bluebell out twice a day for a drag and its great fun, people LOVE puppies :)

Sarah♥

Lynn said...

I think your very right to do to it this way Robert. It's different for someone with agoraphobina like me as we are able to walk, which means we could walk the dog.

But i think it would be too much pressure for Marie. I don't think your being harsh, i think your being realistic. Also you know you have enough on your plate and you'd be left walking the dog ha

Robert said...

Hi Sarah -

Thanks for the comment and I know where you're coming from, but there's a history to this matter...

Marie's agoraphobia started around puberty and got worse from then on. About the time that she started to be unable to walk out on her own, she asked her parents if she could have a dog. Her preferred breed was a bulldog - a very expensive breed (prices for a pup are currently £1,000 or more) - and her parents already had dogs, so they were reluctant to buy another (expensive) one. Their resolve weakened when Marie promised that if she got this dog, she would walk it every day. So in the expectation that owning a bulldog would assist Marie to conquer her agoraphobia, her parents duly presented her with a beautiful bitch.

Marie NEVER walked the dog, and her parents had to take on her care. The dog died last year.

Now you know the whole story, you might be able to better understand my decision. I'm pleased that YOU are getting pleasure from your puppy and I hope that it is able to lessen your anxiety when out.

Robert said...

Hi Lynn -

You're absolutely spot on! I have enough on my plate looking after Marie, 2 young children (not to mention my older children) and a business. I really don't want to add to it!

anxiousbookworm said...

I know... but how can I ignore her? She keeps saying all this stuff to my mom! She is always making things up and makes me the bad person. I am not perfect of course but I am trying to get help. I do lie sometimes about how I feel because I do not want to bother people and am also bad at expressing myself but in general I do not lie, especially about major things. I feel so damn lost and very upset with her.

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Gary said...

I don't think that you are being harsh Robert, you are only trying to help the situation, and it just may be the answer, i hope so! nice little puppy, hope you all enjoy it.

SarahC♥ said...

I apologise Robert.

anxiousbookworm said...

Robert, please come and read my newest entry. I need your help! Please!!

Rachael Hale said...

The Staffy is Beautiful! I have a staff, Jimmy whose 1. I absolutley adore the breed.

When i was living in Essex, just before we moved when my agoraphobia got bad, Jimmy did help me. I would make it my goal each day to give him a good exercise. I eventually managed to get all the way around a big field, out of my comfort zone. I wasnt doing anything else so that dog walk was my way of getting out. Somedays i was unable to go far but most days i did.

I also dont think your being harsh, after all a dog needs walking and with everything you do, you dont want dog walking added to it!
Personally i think having Jimmy did help to get me out the house but for others, ecspecially someone with severe agoraphobia, its totally different. I think you've done the right thing.

Robert said...

Dear Sarah -

No need to apologise! Your original opinion was based on the information you had at the time - nothing wrong with that!

Thanks for taking an interest!!

Robert said...

Rachael & Gary -

Thanks guys. Sometimes I don't know if I'm doing the right thing. Why didn't Marie come with a handbook (lol)?

anxiousbookworm said...

Thank you so much, Robert, for your advice. I have no idea where I would be if I had not started a blog. I will write up an entry once I have went to the hospital. I am very nervous, I hope I can make it there!

Coffeecup said...

I got my two dogs when I was well. The hope was that we would go on very long walks to keep me fit. Alas, didn't work out that way, but they have been the one reliable way of forcing me out of the house. Now I feel lost without them when I'm out and can't feel comfortable unless they're nearby.

Marie is not a teenager anymore and she must realise the consequences of getting a dog? Major commitment! Many of us have asked for pets as kids and our parents have ended up doing all the work. I fully empathise that another dependant is the last thing that you need. However, perhaps a compromise is for you to flatly refuse to walk it yourself. That way if the dog ends up suffering it's her own choice. I'm more inclined to agree with you on this. However my mum has refused to walk mine when I've been really bad, or at least offered to come with me, and in the end I had absolutely no choice but to take them myself. My partners wouldn't take them out, so I had to. Tough love indeed, but it did work.

Robert said...

I'm too soft to offer that compromise! I couldn't let the dog suffer - I would end up looking after it whether I wanted to or not.

We've talked about this a lot & she knows where I'm coming from - even though a part of her doesn't want to recognise the truth.

Anonymous said...

I am like Maria and I am battling through agoraphobia and anxiety. But life is good, very very hard at times but this is my battle that I am determined to win.

I just thought I would send my support to you - my other half like you does more than his share and never seems to get the praise he deserves.

Live life the best you can and be happy with what you have.

J

maz said...

The puppy is really cute, I know they're difficult at first but pets can make things really positive too.

Our dog is really old, she's a wee tubby jack russell and 16 years old too!
AS my son says 'mum she's in her twilight years!'

I'm dreading the day she's no longer with us as we're both so attached to her.

She totally adores Coo, snuggles up beside him when he's poorly so I'm hoping she continues pootling on for a time yet!

Your pics did make me smile and remeber back to when our own was a teeny weeny puppy!

cheers for the nice memory!

maz x

BlyJette said...

Awww, such a cute puppie. :-)

Robert said...

Thanks for the comment & compliment, (anonymous) J. I wish you all the best in your agoraphobic journey. Marie & I have much to be thankful for - not least our 2 little bundles of joy - and much to enjoy; but we still strive to make things even better by removing the anxiety demons.

Robert said...

Hi maz & blyjette -

Puppies may be cute, but they can be a pain in the neck too! I prefer dogs to be at least 6 months old & ready to train.

I've had dogs almost all my life and know just how much pleasure & companionship they can give. If Marie's agoraphobia abates, we'll have another.