Saturday, 18 April 2009

Daddy's dead daddy

Orla and Joseph are very fond of their grandparents - Marie's parents. Sadly, my parents are dead.

"Is grandad your daddy?" Orla (age 3) asked Marie as she was making breakfast. Joseph (7) was in the kitchen too. I was in another room.
"Yes, he is," Marie replied.
"Has Daddy got a daddy?"
"Yes, of course he has. Everyone has a daddy."
"Where's Daddy's daddy?"
"He died before you were born."
"Because he got too old."
"I want to see Daddy's daddy."
"You can't sweetheart - he's dead now."
"I want to see him!"
Orla, clearly upset, left to come to see me. Joseph, witnessing this little drama, followed her.
"Daddy, where's your daddy?" Orla asked me, close to tears. I was unaware of her earlier conversation with her mum.
"He's dead, sweetheart. he got very old and died."
"I miss him!" Orla declared. "I want to see him."
"Well, he's a star now. He's looking down on me, looking after me," I told her, since I think she's too young to fully understand death.
"He's in heaven," Joe helpfully added.  He has heard about heaven at school.
"When it's night-time, I'll show you my daddy in the sky, shining brightly," I said. This seemed to mollify her, and she and Joseph left me.
Orla and Joseph reappeared in the kitchen. Marie was still there.
"Daddy's daddy is a star," Orla announced brightly to Marie. "Daddy's going to show me him tonight."
Joseph gave his mum a conspiratorial smile and a sly wink.
"I don't think Daddy really knows which star he is," he whispered.


Bsquared86 said...

Reading this, I was just thinking that you should go into (non-fiction) writing! You relay stories beautifully!

Robert said...

BS86 - Flattery! I love it!

Nota Bene said...

Joseph...what a great comment!

Robert said...

NB - What can I say? He's obviously the best 7 year old in the world!

Nechtan said...

Kids really do pull the emotional chords. One moment sadness and the next laughter. These moments were really good to read. You handled it really well. Its a lovely way for a child of three to be able to think of it.

All the best


Robert said...

Nechtan - I love these moments with my children. I'm glad I'm writing them down - they're irreplaceable.

Michelle said...

I just love that last bit! Great that you're writing this stuff down!

Robert said...

Michelle - There's so much of my other children's childhoods I've forgotten. I should have started writing sooner...

The Dotterel said...

I know that feeling...

Maximum said...

Not just your Daddy - your son's a wee star too. What a lovely son - and brother - Joseph sounds!


rosiero said...

I like to imagine my Dad as a star in the sky and I'm a helluva lot older than Joseph!!

Robert said...

Maximum - how lovely to see your presence again! I hope all is going well for you. I think Joseph is a star, too!

rosiero - wouldn't it be lovely if the star story was true!